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Murray Journal

Unveiling reality: The challenges and joys of raising special needs athletes

Oct 28, 2024 12:00PM ● By Julie Slama

Bingham High battles Mountain Ridge High in a regional unified soccer tournament. (Julie Slama/City Journals)

Murray High parent Kim Domiguez used to watch other mothers taxi their kids from one practice to another.

Then, while her oldest, Braedon, was in high school, Special Olympics introduced unified sports and Murray High was one of the first Utah schools to jump on board.

Coed soccer and basketball were the first sports, now track and field, swimming and e-sports are options at the high school. The athletes with differing abilities are joined with partners, often peer tutors, to play alongside each other on the same team.

“It used to be that we came up with stuff to do on our own, but now with unified sports, we’re busy,” she said. “I can tell you from a special needs parent’s standpoint, I now understand what soccer moms go through. Unified sports definitely keeps kids involved.”

While Braedon has graduated, he is a constant face on the sidelines of four unified sports, cheering on his brother, Reilly, or more commonly called, Turbo. The high school junior nicknamed himself after the Dreamworks movie, “Turbo,” when he first saw the movie at age 6.

“The only person who he allows to call him Reilly is his brother,” his mother said.

While Domiguez may have an idea of what typical parents do to shuffle their kids and prepare them for competition, not many understand preparing a unified athlete to play.

At Murray, unified soccer and basketball athletes practice 90 minutes once per week.

“As parents, we get their bags ready and then, some of us help the teachers get their gear on, make sure their shoes are tied and are ready for practice. Most of the kids complain about it, asking ‘why do we have to do it?’ It’s outside of their comfort zone. But once they get there, they love it,” she said. 

Domiguez said few unified athletes grew up playing the sport, so they’ve had to learn the skills. Her family also had her sons watch the Utah Royals on TV and YouTube to understand fundamentals.

“It’s been a work in progress. When we first started the program, most of our kids would just stand out on the field. They’ve learned how to kick the ball and where to kick it. Now they play defense. Lots of our kids love to be the goalkeeper because they realize they don’t have to run up and down the field, but then they had to learn how to stop the ball, how to pick it up and throw it. We had to start all over with basketball. At first, they’d stand on the court, put their hands up and somebody would dribble around them. It’s been with the help of the peers, with other teams, the coaches and all these reps, that our kids come to play,” she said. 

Turbo doesn’t have hours of homework, but he does have a life skills class so his mother has him practice the skills at home.

“Sometimes he does well, sometimes I will need to redo it. He loves the vacuum, and he loves to shred. I know if I need something shredded or something vacuumed, it will get done very well. If I need a table wiped off, and I’ve explained it to him 1,000 times, I know I’m still going to have to redo that,” she said.

The night before a game or a meet, it’s not early to bed for Turbo.

“He’s not a go-to-bed early kid. He’s a ‘I’ll go to bed when I am darn-well-ready kid.’ We say nine o’clock, take your melatonin and pajamas and he’s still up at midnight walking around. We try to keep the boys’ schedule the same without disruption. Each kid is different, but most special needs kids love their schedules, and they like it being always the same. I don’t tell him we have a soccer match the night before so he won’t get upset that he will be missing class and will have to make it up. From a special needs standpoint, getting ready and to the event can almost be as difficult as being in the event,” she said.

Turbo gets up at 5:30 a.m. before being at school two hours later “because he’s not in a hurry to do anything in his life. He could shower and then lay down a little, take his time at breakfast.”

On a game day morning, he used to be “on edge.”

“Turbo is a creature of habit. He likes things to be the same, but now he knows what to expect so it’s easier. He knows there’s going to be people there he knows. He’s going to have a chance to ride on the bus. It’s going to be a fun adventure,” his mother said.

Domiguez’ husband, Dean, offered his help to coach the team alongside special education teacher Jessie Agiriga and other educators who have guided the program from its inception.

“Turbo listens to Dean. He didn’t want to come today and we had to put in effort to get him here,” she said about an early fall tournament at Highland High. “Now, he’s all in.”

Still, when the regional tournament rolled around, and Turbo got frustrated, his dad explained, “Turbo’s ideal soccer game is not to play it, but to watch it on TV.”

The frustration came about from Turbo playing on a higher skill level team than he previously competed on as an underclassman. At the beginning of the season, every school tests students’ abilities and from there, it’s determined what unified division level of teams the school will have and where athletes will be placed.

“It’s not always sunshine and roses and he will let us know that. When he’s reaches the end of what he can handle, he needs some downtime,” his mother said. “What’s different about playing unified is everybody is so wonderful and gracious; they want everybody to score and do well. It’s fun to see the competitive nature of a lot of these kids come out, but then also their humanity side comes out even more. If there’s a kid who has shot at a basket six times in a row, you’ll find everybody rooting for the seventh, eighth and ninth attempts until he finally scores. Then we all cheer.”

Domiguez said that’s different than a typical sporting event.

“But don’t get me wrong; our kids still like to win. They know when they come in first or second. They understand our team didn’t win, we might not advance,” she said.

As an increasing number of Utah high schools now have unified programs, competition has stepped up. At the metro regional tournament, there were 55 area teams. Several schools, like Murray, have added additional teams.

Every year Murray’s unified athletes and their partners have qualified for state, even winning the championships multiple times. This year, both teams fell short of being in the championship games while three other area teams — West Jordan High, Alta High and Hunter High — all qualified and finished second in their divisions.

“There’s disappointment. They must face it just the same as any other kid. Sometimes they do well with that, other times they do not. When they don’t, we just talk through it. It’s a lot of the same dynamics and feelings as a typical kid losing, only our kids’ emotions might be a little bit more on the surface,” she said, then added, “Luckily for us, basketball rolls in right after and we’ve already started swimming.”

Her husband, a former Murray High swimmer and water polo player, also coaches unified swim. He’s able to spend time with the team as he has macular degeneration, so he retired from his desk job, and now, with Braedon and Braedon’s grandfather, does construction work for the family business.

Domiguez said both her sons, who were born premature, were diagnosed with autism before age 2 after doctors were monitoring their progress. They attended a preschool for students with autism before entering Viewmont Elementary. Braedon integrated into a kindergarten class while it wasn’t until second grade that Turbo fully integrated.

“His peers didn’t know he spoke until second grade. He was very quiet, and he was a runner. The kids were so helpful, if Turbo got up and ran out, a nice girl would go after him,” she said. “Every year, I’d go to their classes and talk to the kids about what autism is, or answer their questions, ‘why is Turbo acting the way he does? Or should I be afraid of him?’ We thought the best way to combat bullying was let the kids get to know us.”

Now some of those classmates are the ones who fill the bleachers at games or are the cheerleaders rallying for Turbo and the rest of the unified team.

“What’s been fun for the team is when we people are there to cheer for them; they love the support,” she said.

That gift of acceptance and being part of the school is not lost as the Domiguez family returns their support, often going to soccer, softball, volleyball and basketball games to cheer on those players who have helped the unified teams. They even support their classmates in the school musicals and attended University of Utah women’s basketball games, after those players practiced with Murray’s unified team.

Domiguez, as the sole driver for the family, says it isn’t easy, as she herself often attends unified games in a wheelchair as she has “really bad arthritis. We’re a lot better than we look on paper, but we do live in a very different world than I think a lot of people. I used to be a type A personality. Now it’s ‘Let’s just see where the day takes us.’”

She knows she can’t leave her younger son without a “Turbo-sitter” as he has a track record of dumping out all the kitchen spices or emptying the fire extinguisher, but she is pleased he likes his classes such as video editing, ceramics, cooking and zoology. He also participates in Best Buddies program and has attended school dances.

“Turbo got himself a rainbow sequined suit for a Halloween dance. He asked one of his peer helpers to go with him, and she had the same suit. They wore matching rainbow suits and had a lot of fun with it,” Domiguez said.

And those special moments, such as when Braedon scored a last-second shot to win a basketball game, are often relived.

“Everybody went nuts, running onto the court, screaming and dancing. And an hour or two later, we’re driving home, and the kids were still excited. Braedon still brings it up and they talk about how great it was,” Domiguez said. “Those are some of the moments that make us smile and make it so worthwhile.”

This year, Turbo had a memorable goal.

During the season, Murray High ate dinner with the Utah Royals’ unified team and the Spartans met their mascot and the Utah Royals players. Then the two unified teams scrimmaged on the America First field.

“We got our butt handed to us, but Turbo scored a goal, and that’s all that mattered,” his mother said. “When they score, that’s when they’re the happiest and the whole team jumped around, they high-fived each other, and even the Royals unified girls gave them high-fives. We got one goal. Oh, by golly, we celebrated the heck out of that goal.”